Ng Wei Xun Dayan, 13

School: Yusof Ishak Secondary School

Topic: Your organ transplant journey as a teenager

Award: Merit, Junior Category, 2024

As a teenager, experiencing cardiomyopathy felt like your stomach was in the bottom of your toes. I was as energetic and carefree as before; then, I was fatigued and out of breath all the time. I had difficulty even with basic activities like climbing stairs, and hanging out with friends became extremely hard. It was like my heart had said it was quitting.

Getting a tight grasp of my disease was a hard task to do. My heart muscles were progressively becoming weaker; thus, it started being hard for my heart to pump blood sufficiently. The doctors detailed all the risks and possible consequences but all I could hear was the fear and horror. Why was this happening to me?

The following months were overrun with visits to the hospital, tests, and treatments; but still nothing worked. I more or less spent my age watching as my friends experienced normal teenage life while mine was overshadowed by doctors’ rounds and the anxiety that never goes away. Each day I fought, physically and mentally. I felt lonely and afraid, and my mind could not foresee a future that stretched beyond my sickness.

When doctors told me that I needed a heart transplant, I felt like I was falling into a dark hole. The bare thought of such a big surgery was just terrifying; the alternative became even more menacing. For months I was tortured, waiting for a donor's heart. By day my falsehood and euphoria wove the same thread as I waited for the call that had the power to save me.

Finally, the call came. A nice heart donor was discovered. The relief was greater than I had expected, but it was also mixed with sadness. My opportunity to live meant that somebody from another family was in distress mourning the death of a dear relative. This fact hit me hard.

The surgery in itself was dreadful, but I had no other alternative. As I awoke afterward, I felt an unprecedented combination of thankfulness and guilt. I remained alive due to a person's unfavourable situation. It was as much humbling as it was heartbreaking.

Meeting with the donor's parents has been the most life-changing experience of my life. Despite their huge tragedy, they had a chance to do something for others. They managed to take a courageous step that might bring a kind of closure to their huge trauma. Their selflessness and energy just stood out all the time. I tried but words felt inappropriate for the story that had been told to me. How could I ever repay the people who gave me my survival? They had given me much more than a transplant; they had restored my life to me.

After receiving his heart, I promised myself that it would always be his memory that I will be aiming for. I made a decision that I would be worth their sacrifices by leading a worthwhile life. Every step I seemed to take, from graduating from high school to chasing my biggest dreams, was a tribute that Liam was among the greatest present.

Of course, the liver transplant made me alive, it changed my whole life. Having been through this pain myself was the biggest lesson of my life – I’ve become more empathetic and aware of how precious life is. I will be ever grateful to the donor’s parents, whose effort allowed and continued to allow a young life to live. They gave me hope rather than be defined by tragedy, and their son’s legacy has not only been kept but also has been carried out through me.

It was throughout this experience that I learned the significance of organ donation and came to terms with the decision to be an advocate for it. It’s a kind of way to pay tribute to the donor and the same way to give other people the experience I got. The situation used to be way beyond my control and I felt like my life was nothing but hopeless. At a certain point, I managed to see a slight glimpse of it, which was the family that decided to help me. Although their son’s life was unfulfilled and regretfully short, his influence lived on, and I hold that as a constant reminder in my life every day.

Disclaimer: Please note that the views and opinions expressed in the essays for the Live On Festival 2024 are those of the participants and are not endorsed by the National Organ Transplant Unit (Ministry of Health).

To learn more about organ donation and organ transplantation in Singapore, please visit www.liveon.gov.sg